“Clocks are made by men, God creates time. No man can prolong his allotted hours, he can only live them to the fullest.” — Rod Serling, 1963
We all have a finite amount of time on this earth.
During our formative years, we spend our time as if it will never end, constantly enthralled with the wonders of the world, wanting to tear off pages of the calendar in advance, as if to see what the future holds.
At a certain point, we find ourselves wondering where the time went, as we live through the joys, sorrows, and regrets that pile up, trying to keep time from moving on without us.
Somewhere along this journey — if we’re lucky — we discover that ego isn’t everything. That is to say, it’s not all about you.
Once you realize this, you’re on the path to leadership and discovery.
“The purity of his virtue was sullied by excessive vanity.” —Edward Gibbon, 1781
From Me to We
One of the things I help my executive coaching clients with is how to manage their egos. Successful people naturally have healthy egos, but an out-of-control ego can get in the way.
It’s the reason vanity is one of the Seven Deadly Sins (as part of pride). The word itself comes from the Latin vanitas. It also means ‘emptiness,’ ‘falseness,’ or ‘futility.’
I would hope that in your leadership journey, you don’t end up feeling empty, inauthentic, or useless. Quite the opposite.
So how do you balance natural egocentric tendencies with the need to focus on others? Keep these elements in mind: learning, service, and relationships.
You may think you’re the smartest person in the room (you’re likely not), but if you are, bring in someone else who is. Remember: you don’t have all the answers.
You may enjoy the power afforded you by your position, as you delegate or make orders. Recognize: you’re always serving someone else, even if you own the company.
You may revel in a winner-takes-all approach where your win is someone else’s loss and win-win is for suckers. Realize: everything tangible you accumulate in life stays behind when you leave, and your reputation will be relayed in stories for years to come.
The story of Juan Ponce de León is a perfect example. His name is synonymous with the fruitless search for the Fountain of Youth in Florida in the early 1500s.
In his dealings with King Ferdinand, courtiers found the explorer to be egocentric, dim-witted, and gullible. One of them, Gonzalo Fernández de Oviedo y Valdés, fabricated the Fountain of Youth story after Ponce de León’s death to render him forever foolish in the annals of history.
When you make it clear that you’re more interested in learning about other people than talking about yourself, you not only become instantly more interesting to other people (ironic, I know), but you have the opportunity to enrich your life through experiences and knowledge you may not have had before.
The time we invest in learning from others, in the service of others, or building relationships with others is time well spent, indeed.
We all have limited time.
Who’s getting it?
There’s so much to learn,
One more thing
I have a limited number of coaching slots available early this year. If you or your organization would like to discuss your leadership development needs, please set up a time to chat.
“I wasted time and now time doth waste me;
For now hath time made me his numbering clock:
My thoughts are minutes.” — William Shakespeare, c. 1595
This must be for me today. Just this morning, I was introduced to Max Lucado's book, "Cure for the Common Life," which carries a similar message -- use your time wisely, find that which gives your life meaning and purpose, and spend it pursuing those. Thank you for imparting your wisdom, Scott.