“What I aspired to be,
And was not, comforts me.”
— Robert Browning, 1864
I was talking with a client last week about goals and desires.
This client has always wanted to win no matter what, and recent developments have made it impossible for their team to finish the quarter ahead of the competition.
As you can imagine, there are a lot of disappointed and discouraged people. The challenge has been for this client was to keep the team motivated in the meantime.
After a crushing defeat or disappointing performance, a leader might consider discussing with their team:
How are you better for the experience? What did you learn?
How have you come to appreciate the experience of working together with your team members?
How have you made a difference to others?
Who has made a difference to you?
Following reflection on those questions, encourage them to express what they’ve discovered to their colleagues.
Feelings of appreciation and gratitude left unsaid are feelings denied. Don’t deny that gift to yourself or your colleagues.
Reality Comes Calling
We can’t always win. No one bats a thousand — that’s just life.
What we can do is face reality and determine how we move forward, with gratitude and resilience. And perhaps we redefine what success looks like.
Earlier this week, we touched on ambition and how it can be a positive or a negative force. Behind that is how we determine what success looks like, what fulfills us, and where we derive our happiness from.
This is part of the process my executive coaching clients go through when we explore their character strengths.
I help them identify who they are and what matters to them as part of the exercise to refine their purpose and ensure they and their teams are succeeding and growing.
I’ve prepared six previous entries from Timeless & Timely to help you think about happiness and success. These are available to our paid member community, which we call the Ampersand Guild:
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